Have you ever noticed that when things go wrong, it usually is followed by MORE things that go wrong?? It seems like its been monsoon season over here. Setting it off was my not-so-private family drama, isn't that fun! After I decided not to let it affect me whatsoever, I had some other stuff happen. Maybe one day I will have the guts to be more candid on here. A GREAT thing happened though and a family member received some much needed help and I could not be happier. It literally feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of me.
I have to say that I feel like part of the reason that things have been working themselves out, and I have just not let certain things get to me anymore, is because I have been investigating the church.
I use to go to church every week when I was younger, and at about age 13ish, I stopped going all together and haven't been since (aside from the occasional baby blessing) Ironically, Tyson and I were married in a mormon church. Anyway, I have always had major pressure from certain people to go to church. I am the type of person that does not like to do things on others' terms. I decided myself to start going and end this internal battle I have been having about the church for some years now.
I have been taking the missionary discussions also, just to ask some questions and refresh on what the church is all about. I was surprised that there were things I always questioned that were explained to me and made perfect sense. I have a long way to go, but I think I am finding my way. Yesterday was the third lesson and the missionaries came to my house and Tyson participated too, it was great.
Kai and Ashtyn decided that they LOVE church. The first day in primary, Kai sat so tall and proud and you could hear him trying to sing along (since he didn't know the words yet) it was so sweet. Ashtyn was a little shy in primary, but her favorite person was there to comfort her, Molly, our neighbor and good friend.
So, all in all, I am a work in progress and I feel good about the things I am doing. I am taking baby steps and they seem to be making my life a little bit easier, one step at a time. :)
1 comment:
I think you have to do it for yourself or you never feel completely converted. Growing up in Utah it's harder to gain a testimony of your own cause it's just what everyone around you does, but when I finally started to understand it for myself my love of the church grew stonger and I know it's where we are suppossed to be. I hope you find what your looking for too! Love Ya Ky... Let me know how it all goes :)
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